Wednesday, June 13, 2012

Divorce: Where Do I Begin?

Hello, this Stehen ES Daray and this is my first blog posting.  I thought nothing could be more appropriate than to copy from our website the single most important article of the over 20 topic pages.  It’s the “I Don’t Know Where To Begin” page because that is the single most often asked question I get.  Divorce can be overwhelming.  When faced with the totality of the change that will be forthcoming may make you want to curl up into a ball and climb under a rock.   It is a natural feeling but please remember that the rest of the world goes on.  Millions of families experience the pain of divorce.  When life altering events happen to you, you cannot play “ostrich” and bury your head in the sand hoping the problem goes away.   It won’t.  So rather than get overwhelmed, get educated.  One way to do that is to read our website.  We are divorce lawyers who spent the time to write it, and reading it is FREE.

In the coming months, I will post additional blogs (hopefully once per month but depending on my trial schedule).   The goal in those future blogs will be to present different topics or real life examples of how the system does and does not work.   Also, please be warned that the author of the blog (Stephen ES Daray) will get more sarcastic as time goes on.

Thus, to start this blog somewhere, I am pleased to have you read:
 
“DON’T KNOW WHERE TO BEGIN?”
 
 “Don’t Know Where to Begin?” is provided by Schoonover, Rosenthal Thurman & Daray to be your first step in gaining information in the area of divorce law.  Schoonover, Rosenthal Thurman & Daray represents many people going through divorce, but also those who have never been married to the parent of their child.  The same basic principles apply in all child custody and child support cases, however there are differences in law between Juvenile Court (where unmarried parents litigate the allocation of parental rights and responsibilities) and Domestic Relations Court (where married couples litigate the allocation of parental rights and responsibilities).

Whether you are contemplating divorce or your spouse has just approached you indicating their desire to terminate your marriage, it is nothing short of life altering.  Your thoughts might be racing around in your head so fast it seems that you can’t get a handle on the whole picture.  Relax.  Take the time to educate yourself.  What does that mean?  First, read the www.srtdlaw.com website.  It has lots of information and is free.  It does not contain all of the answers; but it will assist to jump start the process for you.  First, you need to identify the issues that apply to your situation.   The website will assist in identifying the issues particular to your situation, so that you know the right questions to be asking a lawyer, your spouse, and yourself about this process.  Qualified lawyers (like us because all other lawyers are a disgrace) can provide different scenarios of what could happen.  Please remember that we are attorneys, not fortune tellers.  Had we been blessed with fortune telling skills, we would be living in Vegas.  By taking the time now and doing the research, it will provide you the knowledge necessary to make the right decision for you and for your family.
 
Secondly, see a lawyer (either great lawyers like us or some hack if you so desire) and get a layout of the different ways YOUR situation might go.   The sooner the better.   Even if you desperately want to reconcile, then your really should do a detailed consultation and get a lay of the land.  It is OKAY to do a consultation while wanting to save your marriage.  You know what it is called???  It called covering all your bases. 

There are many legitimate reasons why people no longer believe they should be married to their spouse.  Consequences, both financial and emotional come with ending a marriage, but the ultimate goal is to find a level of happiness that they did not have previously.  Having worked on thousands of family law matters, the experience of the attorneys at Schoonover, Rosenthal Thurman & Daray demonstrate that this does not happen overnight or in the blink of an eye.  It just may take time to get there but we can assist you in getting there.

You need to first become familiar with and learn about the process of terminating a marriage (or establishing parental rights if not married).  Look at the two theoretical approaches of how to terminate a marriage. Litigation is when you need a court to resolve your differences and Collaboration is when you don’t need a court to resolve your differences.  Read those sections first.  There are an extraordinary amount of different facets of an individual’s makeup, and each will influence the approach will work best for you.   It is different for everybody.

The next step should be to look over the list of individual topic points and see which ones apply to you and your situation.  Once you have decided that legal help is needed, please contact us via email or telephone.   If you know your course of action, then we can discuss representation with one of our qualified attorneys.  If you still don’t know, please contact Schoonover, Rosenthal Thurman & Daray for a consultation.  We can lay out the different options of how to proceed.

The hope is that this website helps you as you begin this emotional and difficult process.  At Schoonover, Rosenthal Thurman & Daray, we focus our practice on helping clients through this legal jungle. Visit SRT&D Law at www.srtdlaw.com or call 216.589.9600 for a consultation.